• LastOfLancas
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    Third Bloodrayne??? Are you for real??

    Anyway, nice review as always 😀

  • Plasticlion
    Comments: 68

    And Clint Howard is obviously speaking with a Peter Lorrish accent.

  • RUcussingwithme
    Comments: 10

    Great review as always Phelous!


    You reactions to half of the bull shit in these movies is alone better then the movies themselves. 


    Cant wait to see whats next!

  • kagesonofbaator
    Comments: 8

    Uwe Boll if you’re going to be bad at least be over the top not boring, like putting vampire-Hitler in a half-robot tank body with flamethrowers shooting out from all sides.  We could have used way more anachronistic elements in this film like a dhampir rap song. 

  • WPB
    Comments: 19

    So that’s why Lupa didn’t get any snacks.
    The movie looked pretty bad, as usual for our old friend Dr. Boll, and I can only imagine that the random sex scene was put in to try and distract us from that fact. And I can only assume that the script had either a really shitty editor or not at all, considering all the continuity errors and stuff. But again, par for the course. I can only hope that Boll actually tries next time, so we can at least get another so bad it’s good film from him (since he doesn’t seem to be going away any time soon).
    And was I the only one disappointed that the Wii didn’t come back to attack Phelous? He could’ve taped the floaty brain cube to it to make it half-human!

  • eecartman
    Comments: 14

    uwe boll is in talks of doing a 4th bloodryne film seeing as how the first 3 were soooooooo awwwwwsome.


  • DementedDawn
    Comments: 10

    This is probably my favorite of the 3 Bloodrayne reviews you’ve done, great work! Although it could be because this one has the most to make fun of.


    Oh and Uwe probably added those two random guys being killed to make it seem more like a video game or something stupid.

  • Johro
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 25

    The “Lesbian sex” expression was the greatest.  I couldn’t even sit through this movie.  Kudos, Phelan, kudos.

  • Drain
    Comments: 9

    Holy shit he actually made a movie that makes even less sense than the ones before it. Was he intentionally trying to make a WORSE product with each sequel??? I only saw the first 2 so I had no idea how bad this one could have been. I swear the only reason there is even a plot here is because Rayne was written to be stupid enough to create that vampire at the start.

  • TnubE
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    Any chance you’re gonna review Blubberella?

  • Joe Romero
    Joe Romero
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    The expression at 7:47 is enough for this movie.

  • Yushatak
    Old Man
    Comments: 4

    Not to pick at the review (love your stuff Phelous), but at around 1:15 if you were insinuating that the gattling gun was unrealistic for the era – it isn’t. Gattling guns were invented in the late 1800s and were used in the Japanese wars over modern technology and tradition that took place around that time, brought by the Americans who seeded the modern things over there and helped defend them (Last Samurai goes over this in a relatively realistic way, aside from the whole American samurai thing).

    What accent is that guy doing? Igor, obviously. It’s a place now. 😐

    • Phelous
      Comments: 625

      I wasn’t saying that. I said it didn’t make sense it was loaded with the bullets that would kill vampires nor is it what Billy the Kid was shot with.

  • barvelou
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    Bloodrayne? What a catchy title. Never thought of that one.