• ggbhtg
    Comments: 68

    What’s with the lip sync fail on the “too far in” scene? Yay, you remembered to add in the “Get over here!” voice clip! But you used “Fatality” instead of “Hara-Kiri” with the guy that blew himself up. At least Reptile got a mention in the end. Ssssshitty Ssssssnake Ssssseriessss Sssssaga hasss ceassssed.

    • Phelous
      Comments: 625

      I fixed that now. I thought of using Hara Kiri but I went with it being MK3 style fatality instead (just think of how the majority of the fatalities in MK3 and it’s versions go).

  • Jorda75
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 27

    Wow, right from the start this movie rejects it’s own logic. The idea behind the original giant snakes is that the flowers made them live longer, and since they lived longer they kept growing and growing. Now for some reason a flower that makes you live longer has been concentrated in a serum that makes you grow? What kind of ass-backwards science is this guy using?
    I can’t believe the CGI is so bad in this, I swear Angry Joe has better green screening in his videos than this entire movie, and the snakes head looks like some kind of lizard, it’s got this great big Jay Leno chin on it 😛
    Another great video Phelous. Loved all the Mortal Kombat references, especially with what I’m sending in the mail tomorrow, mwa ha ha ha ha! 😀

  • QuetzaDrake
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 38

    Great review as usual. You seemed a lot angrier than your usual passively aggressive self, I guess the exponential stupidity of these movies has driven you to that.

    Awesome to see Sub-Zero come back, was worried he’d been fazed out with Ermac appearing, and also awesome to see all those MK jokes. Poor Linden Ashby, indeed… although he says he’ll reprise his role as Johnny Cage in the third MK movie scheduled for 2013! I’ll expect a full review that year from you.

    (Oh, and also I like the subtlety of Wesker’s drawing and your couple of jokes and ending that referenced the snake as Cell from DBZ.)

  • Onta
    Old Man
    Comments: 4

    Um do all snakes rip & chew their food? O_o

  • Tai0Purto
    Comments: 10

    LOL that was an awesome review like usual! XD

    lol it’s been a while since I laughed hard at such bad acting and wiring *if this movie had any*! xD

    first I thought nah, these guys aren’t stupid enough to make a ! but to think if of it, if it brought them enough money they probably would go for it! =____=;;

  • StormyPopsicle
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 34

    after the flower blow up part that hiss or roar, I thought you added that in. wow. those snakes are awful I am so glad I never watched this…oh wait. It’s comeing back to me.

    Crap… Crap I saw this. *sigh* Now to go in the corner and supress another memory… ]:


  • RedSarah
    Fighting Steffi Love
    Comments: 171

    Wow, so much stupid concentrated in one movie. I think my favorite part was the “huh? that’s weird” reaction of the assassin team to the giant snake chasing two people across the horizon.

    Poor Johnny Cage, defeated by a log.

  • Trumpeteer34
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    “Looks like I’m walking,” was amazing. It would have taken at least two people to move that stick! That part with the woman pumping that guy full of lead with that music was the best. Great review, Phelous!

  • moviebuffmel90
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 22

    As if the third was bad enough, this takes the cake. Literally. Also, glad to see Sub-Zero back at last.

  • electronsexparty
    Comments: 17

    Wow. This movie. It didn’t make any se… ah, fuck it. Your review was awesome. Nice use of Fastball’s “The Way;” you made it fit so perfectly. DBZ references always make me happy, too.  


    The return of Sub-Zero (and Imogen Heap!) was glorious.

    This movie was a giant pile of suck, but at least you are done with the logic defying giant not-anaconda movies.  On to a new logic hating movie!       

  • Tyler
    Comments: 6

    Oh my god, that was the hardest I’ve laughed in a while. Seriously, you were spot on with the humour.

  • Spike
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    You know… technicaly… there is another Anaconda. The 1999 movie ‘King Cobra’ also went by the alternate title ‘Anaconda 2’.


  • OuroborosChoked
    Comments: 11

    I was reading through the Red vs. Blue comic when I happened upon this and it reminded me of the review…


    Maybe something was up with minor road obstacles in 2009?

  • PickPikmin
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 26

    Johnny Cage, able to uppercut someone’s head off three times somehow, but when it comes to a small tree on the road, he’s POWERLESS! Where’s Hasslehoff when you actually need him? I can’t believe I said that.

  • TnubE
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    They make your voice sound demonic o__o

  • turbowolf7
    Prodigy Pet Gym Leader
    Comments: 121

    what? no “dammit i’m johnny cage” jokes? still that log did look pretty tough