41 Comments

  • SpawnOfSpawn
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    WHY WONT IT DIE?!?!?!

  • voidangel886
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    I think I would need some red and blue kill you pills if I had to actually watch any of these boogeyman movies all the way through. Great review man!

  • Aural Aurum
    Just might make the CUT
    Comments: 46

    Stupid fucking Pheline-ous.

  • Snes
    Snes
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    Another Boogeyman movie? OH faced!

     

    there seems to be more of these than those frikkin Pulse movies :party:

    • Flash The Wolf
      Flash The Wolf
      Old Man
      Comments: 3

      They certainly seem to be following the same pattern, let’s see…

      Old version – Check
      New version – Check
      Sequels that seem to flip-flop on how anything is supposed to work all the time – Check
      Movie that just adds a word – Check

      All we need now is a crappy movie that had “Boogeyman” as it’s working title and the stupidity will come full circle, and isn’t that what really matters?

  • henotalkie
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    I liked you better when you didn’t turn into a cat and get replaced by an evil-laughing version of yourself. This video sucks.

  • Gutzo
    Gutzo
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    Jeez, even Lommel’s Boogeyman looked much better than this one. 

    Oh, and if Birdemic taught us anything, it’s that the best combination is drama and “horror”!

  • RedSarah
    RedSarah
    Fighting Steffi Love
    Comments: 171

    I have a coworker who chewed aspirin for years (yuck!) and got a hole in her esophagus for it.

    Sounded like you were channeling Checkers (aeshole) just before you became the cuter Phelous. 🙂 Will Phelous D1…(D2?) become the nemesis of Kitty Phelous?

    “Sometimes I look out windows ’cause I’m stupid as hell!” Sorry, I’ve just had “I’m a Stupid Cat” in my head all day.

  • QuetzaDrake
    QuetzaDrake
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 38

    Umbrella Phelous is going to be the worse Phelous ever. Even worse than Phurry Phelous.

  • ggbhtg
    ggbhtg
    CUUUUT
    Comments: 68

    Phillip you poor fool, we’ll NEVER face that dying in reviews is ruined, don’t you KNOW that?! Well, I DO look forward to that review of Meow Mix at least….

     

    The dream state didn’t really give a clue as to why that helped King decide to kill his mom.  It seemed more like he was scared of her dying…. Also, the original song was only Marganars-ly worse? WTF?. For a second there I thought Dewey Cop was actually Ross from Friends. SO close to a Big Friends Actor Cameo Something Or Other.

  • tlaloc4kids
    tlaloc4kids
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 17

    Yaaay Phelous is a stupid fucking cat!  I look forward to your keyboard review.

  • KanoLives
    KanoLives
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 13

    Hold on…Isn’t the Boogeyman protagonist with the bald cul-da-sac half mullet the same guy in “Army of Darkness”? The guy Ash asks if he “wants a little” after climbing out the pit? LOL. Wow, what a weenie. SHAMEALITY!

  • Razorgeist
    Razorgeist
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 35

    Phelous you ignorant slut Acetaminophen isnt aspirin you’re thinking of tylenol. And chewing aspirin is an old drunk’s trick…along with pouring alcohol up yer ass go figure.

    I really hate these Stephen King short stories they’re really unpleasant and just not all that scary. So the Boogeyman is such a prick that he’s not only gonna kill this guy’s kids he’s gonna fuck with him in therapy what sense does that make. This came from the “Skeleton Crew” short story collection and every single story is like this. Though Im really hoping someone has the audacity to do “The Lawnmower Man”.

    • RedSarah
      RedSarah
      Fighting Steffi Love
      Comments: 171

      True, aspirin is acetylsalicylic acid. How is chewing it an old drunk’s trick?

      I think Stephen King’s short stories are (in general) much better than his novels – tighter by necessity, and with much stronger endings.

      I was scared by his story when I first read it, but then I was afraid of things in the closet when I was little, so YMMV.

      • Razorgeist
        Razorgeist
        A Real Turtles Fighter
        Comments: 35

        Apparently chewing aspirin can cause it to take effect more quickly. Alcoholics do it sometimes to enhance the effect of alcohol…how that works I honestly dont know but King himself referenced it in “The Shining”.

        I can see your point but Ive never been a fan of King’s strong endings. And really the concepts he comes up with while good really require more detail.

  • anotherface
    anotherface
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    PhelKat should totally review a horror movie with a dog as the main bad guy like Cujo, Lucky (a movie where the evil dog has evil telepathic powers), Atomic Dog, or Man’s Best Friend

  • TaronCodar
    TaronCodar
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 13

    I have a theory why Phelous regenerated into a cat. You see the movies that Phelous reviewed this episode were so bad instead of unleashing his inner Tomas Guinan he unleashed the beast within which just turned out to be a normal house cat. Meanwhile umbrella did experiments on a Phelous body from the Triangle episode and left their mark on him. This mark allows him to absorb regeneration energy any time Phelous dies. The energy he absorbed was enough for him to come back as Phelous D1 which was all according to umbrella’s plan. Also mirror Phelous was an illusion created by a toxic gas Umbrella released in his home to get Phelous to kill himself and give the energy to Umbrella Phelous to revive Phelous D1. Hey my theory is stupid but it makes more sense than some fan theories out there.

  • whatauselessguy
    whatauselessguy
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    Actually, Acetominophen is more commonly known as Tylenol. Asprin is acetylsalicylic acid. Now you know; and knowing is half the battle 😉

    Edit: I see somebody actually got to this before me 😛 nevermind

  • WikiSorcerer
    WikiSorcerer
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 33

    We get a semi-hilarious regeneration and the return of our favorite
    undead Doppleganger Supervillain through the use of a warped Time-Paradox.
    Awesome.

    So if you “Died” by your reflection taking Matrix Suicide
    Pills then that problably means you (or Cat-Phelous the Fifth Phelous)
    will be doing the 2008 ‘Mirrors‘ (with a backwards R) next huh?

  • MER
    MER
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 25

    Good for you! You don’t die for any fans.

    I think Phelan-cat is a good choice. You’re now fluffy and cute. 😀

    • Jellah-Feesh
      Jellah-Feesh
      Just might make the CUT
      Comments: 46

      Aw, c’mon. Phelous is already cute!  😉

      8:52 JEEZ, that scared me! Some guy, mumbling and turning out lights, then suddenly “TANTALUS PICTURES PRESENTS” Probably the most effective jump scare I’ve ever seen.

      By the way, I love the Phelous Who intro. Lovely effects.

  • Darth Revan
    Darth Revan
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 14

    *three mins later* here have some PEELS for your pain! 😀

  • just a phan
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    So Phelous “dies” again, bring back Phelous D1 and become a cat at the same time… but where is Sub-Zero? Is he still in the kitchen eating icecream waiting for a Mortal Kombat joke? He hasn’t appeared in a long time, so I wonder what he is up to.

    It would be awesome if the next episode included a battle between Sub-Zero and Phelous D1 to setle the fate of cat Phelous.

    • RedSarah
      RedSarah
      Fighting Steffi Love
      Comments: 171

      Somehow I don’t think Sub-Zero would stick around long if he had to change Phelous cat’s litterbox. Or I may be overthinking things.

      😉

  • The FanFic Critic
    The FanFic Critic
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 24

    Phelous is a kitty! Don’t be surprised if I hi-jack your next review to kidnap the kitty-cat Phelous!

  • A Matteo Sandwich
    A Matteo Sandwich
    Old Man
    Comments: 4

    Great review Phelous, if I may, I think you should check out the 2009 adaptation of Stephen King’s novel “Children Of The Corn”, Oh God, is it dreadful, but there’s a really funny neck-snapping scene !

  • ricof22
    ricof22
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    im a big fan phelous i just want say you rock an im away watching your reviews

  • zim294
    zim294
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    i knew those pills where bad news

     

  • TheGuyWithNoName
    TheGuyWithNoName
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 15

    Seriously I’d rather want you to watch Michael bay’s transformers than this atleast it’s not a complete and utter confused mess.

  • zmbdog
    zmbdog
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    Hey, you didn’t do “The Boogeyman and the French Murders”  (aka: Murder in Paris, and several other titles).  I’ve never watched it though so it may be good :-/

  • turbowolf7
    turbowolf7
    Prodigy Pet Gym Leader
    Comments: 121

    that super cool casio keyboard, especially on pipe organ setting, no seriously i dig its 80’s sound. i also heard lester billings won dad of the year that year for that slow motion fall so yeah, he IS the BEST!!!

  • likalaruku
    likalaruku
    Completely Useless Now
    Comments: 934

    But Pheeeelaaan…….Everyone knows the journey to space is the FIFTH sequel. -1/10.

  • likalaruku
    likalaruku
    Completely Useless Now
    Comments: 934

    Stephen King: High as fuck when he wrote it.

    Director: Fresh from art school.