Quarantine

Zombies… err rabid people attack an apartment building while a cameraman makes sure to get everyone’s death on tape.

34 Comments

  • broken_car
    broken_car
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 9

    The original spanish version is better, but yeah, the both suck, lol.

    • Echo_Hotel
      Echo_Hotel
      Old Man
      Comments: 2

      But the Spanish version has a sequel Rec2.

      And only a slight spoiler it wasn’t rabies it was a “make you easy to get posessed by the devil virus”

      Yea and the girl from the first movie shows up and gueeeees what? She’s evil!

       

      So yea they both suck kinda.

  • Literate Dead
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 13

    To be honest, I wasn’t sure this review was that great until the ‘jump scare’ ending. That was great!

     

    Really,
    I don’t think this one is as worthy of mocking scorn as the other
    movies you’ve tackled. The original was a decent horror film with some good scares, but this
    remake… I didn’t think it was that bad. Forgettable, mostly, but not really achingly horrible.

     

    On the other hand, that shoehorned in
    explanation was just as bad in both versions. Zombies do not need
    exposition in a case like this!fake id websites 2021
    The characters are thrown into a chaotic
    situation, and are meant to be in the dark on what’s going on through the whole thing. The (*pointless spoiler tag!*) doomsday cult in this one is a really stupid idea, but the original’s Catholic ‘demonic possession’ thing felt just as stupid to me (in fact, the sequel, [REC 2] makes it stupider yet with talking zombies!). Yeah, sometimes it’s nice to have some background, but not in a ‘found footage’ movie. These are films that are supposed to thrive on missing information. Even the classic of this genre, Ghostwatch, made the same mistake…

     

    But… yeah. Off my high horse now…

     

    Well done review, but I have to say that by the standards of movies you show, this one’s… pretty good. At least, compared to everything else you’ve reviewed! In real standards, it’s just kind of forgettable.

     

    Still, always eager to see what you’ll come up with next!

    • Phelous
      Phelous
      Administrator
      Comments: 623

      Yeah this movie is really as bad as a lot of the others I’ve done but I like doing ones where’s it’s not as easy to point out what’s bad about it.

      Like I said what I was looking for was this movie to try and bring me into the feeling of quarantine which I thought was going to be most of the point of it being from the camera’s perspective.

      But it failed in that so I found myself sitting there thinking how stupid it would be if someone was actually just standing there filming these things and when the finale boiled down to a bunch of jump scares I was left quite disappointed.

  • ZekyZek
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 20

    Phelous, you keep on not dying, what’s that?
    And as always hilarious review. You are the best.

  • omendaos
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    Oh my god Phelous got attacked by another smaller Phelous, quick giv him a Remedy!

  • ileko
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    I remember watching it in the theatres. It was hilarious to see the guy beat the zombie with the POV camera and the lens don’t even break. People were cracking at that scene in there. I don’t think it was the reaction the filmmakers wanted…

  • Ralok
    Ralok
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 9

    as always . . . I am still holding out hope that you will do ghosts of mars, or night of the creeps, or udnead, or something . . . . I want to see terible movies I like destroyed, not movies that i have never heard of

     

    i like your furniture by the way . . . floral patterns are cool (I wish I wasnt being serious)

  • ModeWondershot
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    I’m tempted to go through all your older reviews, Phelous, to see just where I could put Guile’s Theme in an effort to ascertain if it does indeed go with everything. Best results so far include the zombie baby scene from Dawn of the Living Dead, the arm-cutting scene from Cabin Fever 2, and the two scenes you had Skitch re-score from Automaton Transfusion.

    I’m also noting, going back over those old reviews, that your old Richard Wesker (I believe that was his name) title card art has been replaced. Did he not want you using it anymore since you got Andrew Dickman to do your new title cards? Did you want a change? I kind of miss the old stuff, myself.

    Also, the title of this review makes it sound like you’re Italian. Just an observation.

  • Bliz-O-vision
    Bliz-O-vision
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    That was funny stuff! I loved the House of the Dead bit, in fact enough to say it’s one of your top ten best moments for sure. While Quarantine may not have been the worst movie you’ve reviewed, it’s not about what movie you use, but what you do with it, and you sure didn’t disappoint.

  • Drano
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 14

    In terms of story this is an extremly bad movie.. Just because it’s a horrorfilm it doesn’t mean that you are allowed to do whatever you want.. especially if you try to write a story that is set in the “real world”, with stuff that could and would happen in the real world..

    And what was the plan of the police/military outside? To wait until everything inside is dead, first of all the uninfected people?
    Oh wait, they did send in two guys.. yeah, it all makes sense now..

  • Shawn DC
    Shawn DC
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 11

    I remember watching this one. Such a frustrating film full of needless and downright stupid moments.

    Felt sorry for Greg Germann as the clueless vet. He’s a decent actor, but I guess everyone needs to pay the bills.

    One part near the end that rather irked me is
    *Spoilers*
    when our ‘lovable’ firefighter, who up to this point has taken the lead and just about single handily eliminated the entire infected population of this building suddenly decides to step out a door, turn, and wave for the others to follow him. It was such a ridiculous foreshadow for a jumpscare tackle as well as completely out of character. It felt like a lazy scriptwriter going “Uh…we need the finale to just be the woman and the camera guy, so let’s just kill him off in any way.”
    *End Spoilers*

    But I digress. There was plenty to take a shot on with this one and I really enjoyed the review. Thanks for all the effort, Phelous.

    And no, there was no point to the subject I put.

  • EmynStranger
    EmynStranger
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 36

    I remember seeing the trailer for this movie and thinking it looked like it could be cool. I never got around to renting it, though – looks like I didn’t miss anything. I really can’t stand movies where the entire plot hinges on everyone being morons. I like how you pointed out that nobody tried to restrain the zombies (or rabid people, or whatever) or use force on them. There’s no way that the cops wouldn’t have shot that first one when she ran at them, or at the very least cuffed her. On another note, it must be odd having people asking you why you DIDN’T die and when you’re going to! Also, interesting couch. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • PsChill18
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    First I just want to say another great review and this is not a “TROLLIN” comment or something, its just that I have been breeding German Sheppard’s since I was little. And I the one thing I always told people since I was 14 was that even if a dogs is wagging its tail and the hair on the back of their neck is not standing up doesn’t always mean that they just want to play. This is a little known fact because in the cases of dog attacks people are not always looking at the tails (Also most dog related attacks comes from dogs that got their tails snipped so its hard to see.)So dogs who are about to attack do wag their tails, just a little known fact. Well as always a great review I had a ton of laughs can’t wait until next week.

  • Shamussss
    Shamussss
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    Lets not forget about spoonys awesome review of this movie too!

  • Dorkin T Wizzard
    Dorkin T Wizzard
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 7

    Ok, I’ll admit it, I did like that movie.

    That said, I can see all your points, and looking back, I think it was more the company that I was watching it with, we both kind of joked around the whole time about it.

    That said, yeah, it did suck lol

    Thanks again!

  • RedSarah
    RedSarah
    Fighting Steffi Love
    Comments: 171

    I think the stupidest thing about this movie is that in every single commercial and trailer they showed the ending! I guess they thought it was a good twist, but it just made me feel really cheated…

    That magical super weaponized camera was hilarious. And good job dragging yourself backwards. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  • StormyPopsicle
    StormyPopsicle
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 34

    i saw this with my brother and father. we picked this up because the last zombie is pan from pans labyrinth and the pale man. My brother and i had wanted to see him because we were like “THIS GUY’S SO COOL! O:”

    I thought anyway, that the movie wasn’t to bad.. a lot of room for improvement and it was kind of stupid, but at least it wasn’t clover field camera work. that was terrible. I even wonder if you will touch up on that one… or the original Blair witch… weren’t their 3 of those? >_> someone check my sources I’m lazy.

    so yeah, if i had to rate this it be a 5 or 6. only because the camera work didn’t make me sick. but yes, stupid stuuuupid plot.

    I have the urge to check out the original now…

    • RedSarah
      RedSarah
      Fighting Steffi Love
      Comments: 171

      I saw Blair Witch on opening night, and really enjoyed it. I thought the ending was pretty creepy. It was probably improved by seeing it with the audience I did, since everyone was really into it. I think the camera thing is probably the least ridiculous in it too.

      I liked Cloverfield too, though that one’s definitely in “guilty pleasure” territory…annoying characters (mostly), the most ridiculous camera thing, the plot so predictable you can practically time the story beats.

      Blair Witch 2…man, that one needs to be reviewed. It’s about as connected to the first as Pet Sematary 2 was. My brother and I watched it, and afterwards saw the special feature that mentioned the stick figure thingy is hidden throughout the movie (I’d spotted it a couple of times), and couldn’t bring ourselves to watch it again to find them all.

  • Echo_Hotel
    Echo_Hotel
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    I really liked the way you did this review.

    The amount of mocking and sneering is just right this time.

    Sometimes you get a little obnoxious with all of the screaming and flailing but I’m still watching so I guess it’s never that bad.

  • psychosilpelit
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    guess the makers of this played left 4 dead..or possibly the other way round. seriously what the hell is that camera made of? it could probably take a bullet

  • Nils B-Film
    Nils B-Film
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 21

    Wasn’t too fond of the original REC, but this remake seems pretty nonsensical and the dialogue worse. The camera-as-weapon was such a redicilous concept.. especially when it’s just used like a pool-cue to bump the lens into the womans face. The House of The Dead joke was hilarious, and so was your own remake of the ending!

  • Ellison Hawley
    Ellison Hawley
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    As of this writing, indestructible video cameras have been confirmed as a melee weapon for Left 4 Dead 3.

  • Phoenixfirex
    Phoenixfirex
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    GOD DAMN SHIT!!! *Bangs head on Desk*

    That movie was horrible!

     

  • Dejablue
    Dejablue
    CUUUUT
    Comments: 65

    I actually kind of liked the original movie. At least it seemed to  be filmed better.

  • BMC
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    Phelous, I love your reviews so much, but I must be the only one of your fans who actually finds them scary… You must have nerves of steel to be able to film some of this stuff – hats off to you for not being a silly scaredy-cat. Like me. ๐Ÿ˜€

  • MaxIrons
    MaxIrons
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    I don’t know how it works in Los Angeles, but when I worked with 9-1-1 in Fort Worth, TX the firemen went out on every medical call.  They usually arrived on scene long before the actual ambulance did.  When I had a vertigo attack so bad I couldn’t even sit up, the firemen arrived 30 minutes before the ambulance did.  So if Los Angeles works on the same principles, that part actually makes real world sense, just not common sense.  Otherwise, I love your work man.

  • stonedXmonkeysXhero
    stonedXmonkeysXhero
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 22

    sorry phelous this is a guilty pleasure for me and i think the characters where not that bad and plot expesition was very brief besides the stupid rabbies part

  • Maku
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    It’s a little late to comment on this, but still – I watched the original hispanic “REC” version when it first came out, and I have two things to say about this – I didn’t even know that it had an “american” version (or whatever you reviewed) but the original had better pasing, and the jump scares were not as annoying but the second, most frustrating thing is… the original ending was almost as dissapointing as it was here, but worse – because the film was better earlier, the stupid ending was even more frustrating, as it was almost the same…

  • Maku
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    So much frustration that my english went astray, but yeah… this version just destroyed the memories of the fim (Rec) that I’ve seen.

  • cRaZyJ21
    cRaZyJ21
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 19

    Survival of the Thickest: the Movie.

    The dog was very happy to kill the stupid people. Hence the waggy tail.

    Oh man I broke my laugh box when the piano/elevator music cut in at the rabid dog scene.

    The real message of the film: Stop the camera abuse. Because in a few thousand years, the cameras will evolve to have feelings and they will wreak havoc on those who make them film such garbage…

     

    Sorry I think half my brain just died. Imma go film some highly ill and contagious people on location withadelayedreactiontosettingupquarantine@*&$(*&@#_)!!!!!!

     

  • Alex C.
    Alex C.
    JUST GOT ACTUALLY-ED!
    Comments: 151

    Quarantine was an okay horror film that was a shot-for-shot remake of a greatย Spanish horror film, REC. It and its sequel REC 2 were actually good movies. They were weird, however, in their explanation of the virus or whatever. Like, suddenly at the end of REC the movie gets all Catholic and religious all of a sudden. But it was made in Spain, a heavily Catholic country, and in that context, it makes sense. I also like Quarantine’s sequel, which took a departure from the REC franchise, more than Quarantine itself.

    Basically, REC, REC 2— good movies. (Not so sure about Quarantine 2, it’s been years since I saw it, but I tentatively call it a good movie as well.)

    So, as this is a very faithful remake in terms of style, this is one of the very few reviews I find myself at total odds with Phelous. It’s kinda hard to watch him rip on parts that were actually good.