43 Comments

  • Temi4
    Temi4
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 9

    Ohhhh YEEEESSS!!! That what i was waiting for, a new review. Thank You!!!

  • Desertpunk23
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 30

    Phealous you think this movies bad? You should watch Bone sickness, seriously, youtube a scene. lol

    • InternalDemons
      Old Man
      Comments: 3

      Man I though I was the only one who ever saw that pile of shit. A movie that literally tried to hard to be shocking I mean honestly the most nasty retarded thing I have ever seen.

    • Phelous
      Phelous
      Administrator
      Comments: 625

      Well I’ll try to check that one out but it’s not going to change this movie from being bad haha.

  • EmynStranger
    EmynStranger
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 36

    Holy crap, that movie looks awful! I think the only thing that could make it worse would be Five Across The Eyes-style shaky cam. It just fails on every level, like it was made by someone who’s never even seen a movie before. And did you know they’re making a sequel? Birdemic II: Resurrection 3D. I’m not kidding. http://www.birdemic.com/BIRDEMIC-TheResurrection.html

    Can’t wait for part two of the review, it looks like it will be awesome! 🙂

  • Earthbound_X
    Earthbound_X
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 31

    This makes me wanna watch the Rifftrax of the movie again, haha.

  • Markseth
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    I’m pretty sure Rod said “You look divine,” but the audio quality of this movie, as well as the actor’s line delivery, is so good that I can see how one could mishear it.

  • djarbum
    djarbum
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    Tales From The Empire!

  • deadgeneration420
    deadgeneration420
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    This may be the only thing that can combat The Room in awfulness. The difference being that at least The Room was hilarious to watch, while this is just awful and not entertaining even at how bad it is.

  • Demonjack123@aol.com
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 24

    This….abomination…makes me hurt in places I didn’t even know I had 🙁

  • RedSarah
    RedSarah
    Fighting Steffi Love
    Comments: 171

    I heard “divine” too, but yeah, when someone tells you that in a voice that bored, he might as well tell you you look fine. 😛

    I never thought I’d ever see an awkward thumbs up. And I laughed so hard when the mom said she likes to cruise. Must be doing that when she’s “helping” her daughter in her modelling.

    I really hope those bird videos don’t ruin the Art and Pumpkin Festival!

  • VandalMonkey
    VandalMonkey
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    The only explanation for crap like this existing is that the creators did it on purpose. That has to be it. They know that the Internet loves ripping apart shitty movies and that’s great free publicity.

  • SpecterM91
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 9

    Everything I can find about this leads me to believe that it was a huge joke. You don’t accidentally spell your movie’s official website wrong on flyers. You just don’t.

  • QuetzaDrake
    QuetzaDrake
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 38

    Wow, that was uncomfortably close to After Last Season in terms of awfulness. Also, can’t wait for you to tackle the sequel coming out this fall!

  • irishrepublic13
    irishrepublic13
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    Phelous, how did you find this movie? It saddens me that such a thing exists.

  • omendaos
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 10

    Oh god, Rod has actually managed to become creepier than Lawrance from the original Wolfman. I think the driving was the director’s referance to the greatest movie ever made: Manos the Hands of Fate!

  • joebigge
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    Dude you left out the part with his sale! he got a sale for 1 million dollar…. and he gave a 50% discount wich meant it actually costs 2 million dollar! That’s not a good sale imo. Yes I watched the rifftrax of this 😛 Anyway awesome review!

  • ModeWondershot
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    Was this movie edited by the guy who did the Transformers film series? So much irrelevant detail and failure to use appropriate transitions and edits…

    It’s interesting to note, though, how a movie can be bad for all sorts of reasons, but editing usually isn’t one of them. It’s good to see at least some variety in the terrible movies Phelous sends to the review guillotine.

  • StormyPopsicle
    StormyPopsicle
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 34

    what’s with that waitress…. dude, i was a waitress for a few years. if i smiled like that i don’t think i’d have a job. and there was something unsettling about that. and a note on the guys acting. who has to ACT like they’re walking into a restaurant? ugh he’s awful.

    “full blown crazy killer stalking” and the guy runs out a oddly full restaurant. >> o…kay?

    “excuse me miss *touches her on back*” NO. NO ONE DOES THAT IN REAL LIFE. the girl would have been freaked of if it was -_- this is awful >> i’m going to ignore a lot of these because my comment will be a novel if i don’t.

    *breaks out into dance at flock of seagulls* <3

    Despite the craziness, the old woman seems to be the only one who can kinda act.

    can't wait for part two. My brain need to recover from the amazing acting.

    • Phelous
      Phelous
      Administrator
      Comments: 625

      The main girl isn’t too bad at points, she at least seems like she’s trying, especially compared to wooden rod. But you see her smirking a lot, however, sometimes it’s the stupid editing’s fault.

  • Meangreenmother
    Meangreenmother
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 16

    This was hilarious to watch.
    Didn’t know a movie could fail this hard.

    Nice bird figurine collection!

  • geddyb
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 20

    Great review so far…. You should do more grade Z films… This makes Resident Evil look like Pulp Fiction…

     

    That scene with the mother reminded me of some old person insurance commercial… I seriously thought that you spliced in a clip from one!

  • geddyb
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 20

    The quality jof this movie makes me think of a local film that was made when I was 15. (15 years ago)  Called Delayed Vengence.  The guy that made it was some local business guy… I can remember it was supposed to take place in modern times, but the FBI raided the bad guys carrying Tommy Guns!  It was even worse than this!  We had a big opening and everything… (My family owned a movie theater) 

  • broken_car
    broken_car
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 9

    I can’t wait for the second part of this review. I wonder the birds died of boredom, or simply they were crazy to be flying on such crap and decided to kill everyone in this ”movie”? Lol.

  • SsnakeBite
    SsnakeBite
    CUUUUT
    Comments: 76

    Oh boy oh boy oh boy… I read a written review (complete with tons of pictures of the shitty CGI!) of this film on a French website about so-bad-it’s-good movies and if that review was any indication… that first part was NOTHING compared to what’s yet to come, mostly because the director REALLY wanted to make it a spectacular SFX-fest. Unfortunately, he didn’t have the budget or the competence for it (because as Phelous proved many time, you don’t need a huge budget to make good effects). It seriously takes some particular skills to make special effects this bad, especially considering how most of it is completely unnecessary (come on guys, you couldn’t afford to rent a couple birds and one or two smoke machines? Did you really HAVE to use CGI for that?).

     

    I thought there could never be a movie worse than The Room, but I was mistaken. At least that one doesn’t have unnecessary vomit-inducing CGI.

    • SsnakeBite
      SsnakeBite
      CUUUUT
      Comments: 76

      Why yes, I AM replying to my own comment. Watcha gonna do about it, huh? So yeah, I forgot to ask an importnt question… when can we expect the second part? Days feel like weeks when you’re waiting for the second part of an hilarious video about an hilariously bad movie.

  • DavidSH23
    DavidSH23
    Old Man
    Comments: 4

    Phelous I’ve seen you’re bad movie reviews before but this movie Has got to be the worst movie Outta’ the bunch Seriously.

    The editing was Awful, The acting was Terrible, CGI Sucked… And worst of all transitions, fades and music Were not fitting to the film at all.

    I’m sorry you Had to suffer through this Peice of Sh*t movie Damn directors these days have NO IDEA how to make a movie.

    But phelous do you think you can Suffer through a film called… The Room (2003)

    …think about it?

  • Ellison Hawley
    Ellison Hawley
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    There’s nothing that makes a film less watchable than cgi that makes The Asylum’s films look good and random political commentary! I’m almost afraid to even look at the second half…

  • Sunnymuffins
    Sunnymuffins
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 7

    Wait a minute! Wooden Whoeverthefuck said he knew a good Vietnamese restaurant, but the sign behind them when they were in front of the building mentioned Thai cuisine! >:[

  • Cloudkiller91
    Old Man
    Comments: 2

    Another hard to watch review….no It’s not because phelous isn’t awesome, he’s GOD LIKE…well..not really, but he is cool as he can get. It’s hard to watch because even CLIPS from this movie hurt me.

    Besides that, great review Phelous, at least it’s not as bad as After Last season, not even Spoony at his best could save THAT film.(This is very close though)

  • animedude
    animedude
    Old Man
    Comments: 1

    Um Phelous… why do you keep a box of tissues next to your bed?

    • Rakmi
      Rakmi
      CUUUUT
      Comments: 78

      BLASPHEMY! Out of all the characters in Lucky Star you picked Miyuki, aka the most annoying twat in the history of animation, for your profile picture?

  • Jorda75
    Jorda75
    A Real Turtles Fighter
    Comments: 27

    This is just terrible, I could give a camera and editing software to a bunch of 5 year olds and they’d make a better, more consistent film than this! Hang in there Phelous!

  • Karkat Vantas
    Karkat Vantas
    Old Man
    Comments: 3

    “Your physical appearance looks acceptable to my visual sensors.”

     

    That is a million times sexier than fine/devine…whatever the hell wooden rod said.

  • turbowolf7
    turbowolf7
    Prodigy Pet Gym Leader
    Comments: 121

    whenever i drive its a wonderful magical fantastical expierence, especially when i’m awake while doing so! good ole wooden rod, i’m so glad he had time to share during his busy schedule to appear on the show. your sarcasm, phelous,is almost as magical as driving… yeah? yeah? yeah yeah yeah… keep it up!

  • XiaolinDeadpan
    XiaolinDeadpan
    Old Man
    Comments: 4

    The minute I saw JohnTron’s review of this I laughted so badly the minute thoose “birds” showed up on the screen.

     

  • likalaruku
    likalaruku
    Completely Useless Now
    Comments: 935

    It would be awesome if you & Lupa made a Birdemic 1 & 2 parody.

  • cRaZyJ21
    cRaZyJ21
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 19

    mewhshdfjnembenehnbeneb…

    *One fresh brain transplant later*

    Wow how did my previous brain die from just seeing clips of this motion picture that just needs to exist??

    Insane laughter: Helping us get through insanity of any form since… since whenever.

     

  • The Mouse Avenger
    NewbieDotCom.Com
    Comments: 5

    Say, uh, Phelous…I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but all of your “Birdemic”-related videos have disappeared. 🙁 You’ll need to put them back up again. 😉

  • likalaruku
    likalaruku
    Completely Useless Now
    Comments: 935

    Awe, they’ve been made private 🙁